So, I’m writing this on my iPhone. Small screen, small keyboard. But, if you can see your way past the inevitable spelling mistakes, it could make interesting reading.

It basically means that I should be able to update my blog, albeit in small bitesized chunks, more frequently.

Yes, there is Twitter. Yes, there’s nothing here that I probably can’t do on Twitter. However, this will probably allow me to leave posts with some degree of permanancy. Nice.

Right, back to MOTD. Long day beckons tomorrow. Goodnight mobile world. See you tomorrow.

Sort of following on from my previous post really – I’m not thinking coherantly this morning, so I’m just writing down what’s coming out.

As I’ve got older, I’ve thought about experiences and times of my life that really meant something to me at the time. My life story is an interesting one – but has lots of facets to it.

I was 17 years old and working in a music shop in Yeovil – pretty much making the tea. This is possibly not what my parents had in mind for me as they saw me growing up. However, it was good fun. I was priviledged to work with an exceptionally inspirational guy, called Simon. We’re still friends to this day. He taught me how to sell. He also taught me how to talk to people – being the grumpy sod of a teenager as I was. Anyhow, he put me in touch with the manager of his other store who was looking for a bass player. Now, I couldn’t play bass. Not a note. Some would argue I still can’t. Anyhoo… I blagged my way through saying I’d give it a shot, and I got invited to an rehearsal with a band called Saints n Sinners – a classic rock covers band. Got there, nearly died. Awesome guitarist, awesome keyboard player, awesome drummer, awesome singer. Shit bass player. Cutting a huge part of the story out, they had no other option and as a group of people, we just clicked. We had an amazing laugh. Hadn’t laughed so much in years. We decided to give it a go. 6 or so rehearsals later and we had a half decent set. Barrie (singist in said band) organised our first gig, downstairs in the pub where we rehearsed. It went well, we got people there, they had fun, we got paid. Nice. Barrie organises another one. The Newmarket Hotel in Bridgwater. Great venue, lots of people. We were starting to get a name for ourselves after 2 gigs. Awesome! A month or so later, I get a phone call from Baz. “we’ve got a gig” – cool, I reply. “It’s at Hinkley Point power station, in a huge marquee in the grounds of the social club” – Cool, I reply. “Supporting ELO”. Shit, I reply. Can we do it? Is it possible? Are you joking? Nope. The big day comes and goes, we play to about 2,000 as the warm up (venue held 10,000!) but people were down the front listening to us. Amazing. I shall never, ever forget it.

Anyway, cutting huge amounts of the story out. We split after 5 years of playing together. The gigs were less frequent in the latter years, our original drummer left and a replacement was drafted in. It didn’t really work out and the atmosphere wasn’t really the same. I left, the original drummer came back (I don’t think it was personal!!) – I’d gone. We all lost touch and had done for the last 8 years, until about 3 months ago.

The singer, Barrie, added me as a friend on Facebook. As did Chris (drummer) and Eug (Guitarist). I’m still in touch with Mark (keys). We decided it would be fun to catch up for food and a beer or two. Eventually, it was just Chris, me and Barrie that turned up to the Blackbrook Tavern in Taunton. It felt like yesterday. Great food. Great conversation, I nearly cried with laughter at one point! Then it was on to Taunton town centre to go and watch a covers band. Of course, conversation turned to remembering our S&S days… the gigs, the music, the fun, the jokes… I’m so pleased that I’m in touch with these boys again. What fun it was. I’m putting together parts of my life that I’d pushed to one side. Parts of my life that I’d brushed away. I have been so fortunate to meet so many amazing people in my life so far. Amazing people, with great souls. People who have been genuine friends for me. Who still remember little touches with me. Who were always there when I needed an ear – who I didn’t have to ask, they just knew.

I threw a lot of this away when I moved away from the South. I think about what a bad friend I have been to them, as I have lost touch with an awful lot of them. All in order to find a “fresh” start up here in the Midlands. I am carrying so much baggage around with me – I feel like I don’t know how to address it. People up here know what I let them know about me. People down South know me warts ‘n’ all. Never the twain shall meet hopefully. The interesting side of the equation, is when you have to start asking the question that, are the people who only see the side of me that I’m prepared to give away (and therefore what I consider my best aspects) the genuine friends I think they are, or is it the rough around the edges, difficult at times, friends who know me warts ‘n’ all and who can recount stories about me of incidents I don’t want to remember? Interesting stuff…

I have recently celebrated my 33rd Birthday. I have now walked around on this earth for 33 years. I celebrated it at the NEC in Birmingham, as has been traditional for me for the last 4 years – doing the set up for Music Live.

In the evening, the wonderful and fabulous (I keep saying that, as every day I wake up and realise that she’s lying next to me – I count my blessings. She is the most amazing woman in the world and I love her more than anything) Sal took me out to Portabello’s in Aldridge – I LOVE Itallian food. I mean, LOVE it.

A cheeky stop by The Duke in the evening was much appreciated, for a cheeky lager before bed.

The older I get, the more I think about the last and what I’ve actually done with my time on this earth. The more I think about it, the more I get depressed. I’m trying not to think too hard about it, but it’s difficult as I realise that I’m running out of time with each an every day that passes by. Time is a train, it makes the future the past. It leaves me standing in the station, my face pressed up against the glass.

Bugger. I think that’s the second time in as many months that I’ve used the same lyric. Ok, I’m a U2 fan. I’m not ashamed.

But I’m not. I have neglected this blog AGAIN! How many times am I actually going to write “I must update this”, “my new resolution is to make sure that I update this blog regularly…” and so on and so on.

Anyway, whilst I remember, here’s a few updates.

I guess the main one is that I completed the Birmingham Half Marathon! I did it in a final time of 3hours and 6 minutes. This was not the time I wanted to finish it in, but it wasn’t bad. The main thing is, I actually finished it!

The most unfortunate thing about it was the fact that on the friday before the race, Sal started to complain of not feeling too well. As both Sal and I were nervous about our first competitive race, I put it down to nerves really. It had also been a tough week for her. As the weekend progressed, she started to feel worse. Saturday came and ended with complaints of a sore throat and temperature, then race day came and she was in a terrible state and definately not fit to run. It ended up being tonsilitus. After months of training (doing really well too), Sal was gutted and not able to run.

So, Nick Clarke and I drove in to Birmingham to start the race on our own. We met up with Nick’s friend Brett (a good runner – made me feel even more nervous!) and found our starting place (towards the back with all the other non professional runners). After the race started at 10.00am, we finally crossed the start line at about 10.20am. I kept up with Nick and Brett for about the first 1.5 miles, but their pace was a little too quick for me, so I wished them good luck and off they went. I decided that if I was going to finish this race, I needed to do it on my own terms and at my own pace. The first 6 miles felt very comfortable to me really. I was doing a good average, with about a 10-11 minute mile, meaning I would come in at an expected finish at 2hours 20 or 2hours 30mins. At 9 miles, I hit my wall good and proper. My groin gave in and I made the fatal mistake of slowing right down to a gentle jog and eventually a walk. This allowed me to cool down and then the muscles started to freeze up. I started to get stiff and the pain REALLY started to kick in. It became VERY painful to walk in the end. The last few miles were a slow walk for me really until I finally saw the finish line and then managed to find the energy to kick through my pain and jogged towards the finish line.

I have learnt from my mistake this time. The race was an amazing experience. I loved every single second of the event and Birmingham did everyone proud. They were superb in their support of the competitors, handing out water and clapping and cheering. I felt really proud to call Birmingham my home city today.

Sal and I have now entered the Silverstone Half Marathon in March 2010, as Sal needs to run a race! You can’t do all this training for nothing can you??! ;-)

Finally, a MASSIVE thank you to everyone who believed in me and contributed to making a fantastic final figure of £605.00 for Cancer Research UK. You have made a massive difference and I am genuinely humbled by your generosity.

I really should be more disciplined with this blog. However, I’ve almost lost count of how many times I’ve posted that opening statement now.

I’ve just be travelling, travelling and travelling – or so it seems.

Since my last update, I have been to Hamburg, Belfast and Glasgow on business. I have been away to the South of France on holiday and I have spent an extended time away in that sprawling metropolis known as Milton Keynes (again, on business).

The holiday was awesome. It was a fantastic villa, right in the middle of nowhere (well, not nowhere really, it was, of course, in the South of France, in a place called St. Laurent Du Bois). It overlooked the vineyards, looking across the hills and was just perfect. It was beautifully furnished, complete with fantastic swimming pool and the weather was just perfect – well, aside from a crappy day on the day we were coming home.

We spent the week with Mike, Nicky, Oli, Emily and Eva. Lots of wine, cheese, fun, laughter, hangovers, coffee, walking, sunburn and general relaxation. Sal and I managed to get some time away from the rest of the group and we spent the day in Bordeaux, which was simply stunning. Fantastic architecture, hidden gems of Churches and Cathedrals and miles of historical buildings. As we like to try and do, we took a tourist tour around the city and learnt a lot. One of the interesting things about it was that a lot of the restored buildings along the riverbank have not long been cleaned up – around the late 90’s early 2000’s. It was undertaken by the city’s mayor who is widely credited for rejuvenating the city’s streets and installing the tram system etc.

The staggering fact I learnt too, was that the incredibly beautiful and historic Cathedral in the main centre was only designated as “listed” (or the French equivalent) and given historical monument status in 1998 – which considering it’s stood for nealy 800 years was something that really suprised me!

In general terms, this leads me on to another subject… Having now been to the Pyramids and seeing how close they were to the city and knowing the recent history about how they were stripped of the stones by the locals until given a preservation order in the late 50’s early 60’s, the way we treat our historical buildings is a disgrace.

Well, the moment finally arrived and Sal and I headed down to Wembley to see U2 on their latest world tour. Incredible!

I’ve followed U2 for years – with my first live experience of them at Leeds Roundhay park for the Zoo TV tour in, errrm, ‘93 I think. I’ve subsequently seen PopMart at Leeds, Elevation at the NEC and Vertigo at Cardiff.

In my opinion, the setlist tonight was just about near on perfect. I know the album has had some tough reviews from certain quarters and I don’t think it’s their best either – but the first half at least is fantastic. The opening of the gig contained Breath from the new album – a slightly strange opener IMHO but good to hear live. This was followed by No Line on the Horizon, which again was great to hear live but possibly in the wrong place in the set to get the really large Wembley crowd going. However, in the light of what was to come, you could understand the positioning this song somewhere in the set was going to be tough one! ;-)

Far too many highlights to mention, but they sounded particularly stunning on Get On Your Boots, Magnificent, Elevation, I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For, The Unfortgettable Fire, Vertigo, Pride, Where The Streets Have No Name and Mysterious Ways.

Their energy was superb, the live sound was awesome (despite it being a little on the high end side in the early stages) and the complete package was just awesome. All the componants of the great mamouth U2 sets of the 90’s, coupled with the simplicity of fantastic band playing fantastic songs. Really enjoyed it. I mean, REALLY enjoyed it! ;-)

Complete set list for your viewing pleasure;

1) Breath
2) No Line On The Horizon
3) Get On Your Boots
4) Magnificent
5) Beautiful Day
6) Elevation
7) I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For
8) Stuck In A Moment
9) Unknown Caller
10) The Unforgettable Fire (bloody awesome version!)
11) City Of Blinding Lights
12) Vertigo
13) If I Don’t Go Crazy Tonight
14) Sunday Bloody Sunday
15) Pride
16) MLK
17) Walk On
18) Where The Streets Have No Name
19) One
20) Mysterious Ways

Encore

21) Ultra Violet
22) With Or Without You
23) Moment Of Surrender

Well, training for my entry in to the Birmingham Half Marathon is now well underway. I have about another month before I need to be able to run for 8 miles without stopping. Eeek!

The most I have managed at the moment is about 2 miles – only another 6 miles to go then! I have decent running shoes, which make all the difference in the world. I have new shorts and new t-shirts. All of which are very nice and very comfortable. I tell you though, it’s bloody hard work.

What’s really surprised me so far is that my legs are holding up remarkably well. It’s my chest that’s causing me all the pain. Well, dur! I guess you’d expect that from a smoker wouldn’t you? Well, yes. I’m getting there though. I ran with Stat yesterday for about 3.8 miles – for the first time, it actually felt pretty comfortable.

It’s really strange to describe this, but you actually get to a point where it becomes quite pleasurable to keep running – it’s the strange point of where the pain becomes quite nice! It’s hard to write that without sounding a little like an S&M enthusiast… but either way, it’s getting slightly easier.

Time to pack the fags in now though and see what sort of difference that starts making to my health. If I manage to lose some weight in the process, the bonus begins… Looking back through some old photos on Facebook that someone put up of me when I was 18 suddenly made me realise that I haven’t aged very well – it would be at least nice to be able to get my figure back, even if my hair is long gone! ;-)

I will keep you posted with progress…!

“It’s like a musical journey”

Firstly, I have to say that this post has nothing to do with U2. Yes yes, it’s a shameless plug to get picked up by search engines etc – I need more hits on my rather dull and lifeless blog.

However, in keeping with the theme – I really do feel like I’ve been on a musical journey of late.

First up – blur at Hyde Park. Just to give you an insight in to my blog writing, I actually mis-typed blur and put blue instead. I was very tempted for a moment to leave it and make people think that I went to see blue at Hyde Park. How ace would that have been? Ok, you’re right – not much.

Anyhoo, back on subject. Blur at Hyde Park. I’ve got to be honest, I was not a happy bunny about these tickets. Blur announced that they were to be playing a reunion gig in Hyde Park. I waited eagerly to get my tickets for the Friday 3rd July show and it’s bloomin’ well sold out in record time. Dammit.

So, when news of a second show popped up for Thursday 2nd I waited eagerly by the phones and the email… lines opened – BINGO! Got two tickets! I thought, this would be a great day out for Sal and I… Of course I’d forgotten that Sal works in the day (as do I – but it’s a lot easier for me to take the day off than it is her) – so a quickly arranged phone around to my friends resulted in Matt taking the spare ticket off my hands and a great day out together in London ensued. We drove to London, managed to park just off Abbey Road which was ace.

Parking just off Abbey Road was cool – as Dropknee (my old band – before I joined – if you know me, that will make sense) recorded at Abbey Road – something I would love to have done, but I hadn’t joined the band by that point. I’ve seen the film of that day and laughed many times, so it was with some fun and not without a sense of irony that we found ourselves there. Matt tried to photograph and film me crossing the zebra crossing, which I refused to do, so he filmed me crossing by the side of the crossing instead, much to the amusement of the tourists watching on, who were laughing at us NOT wanting to cross on the zebra crossing. Anyway, it was funny at the time.

We walked down towards the tube and then towards Hyde Park. We did McDonalds (yum) Sainsbury’s for a four pack and then a laze around outside the main gates to the gig before walking in to the venue late afternoon. We soaked up what was left of the late afternoon sun before watching a fantastic blur come on a perform an amazing set.

I did mention that this series of gigs annoyed me. It’s not much of a reason, but it’s the fact that they announced a series of “warm-up” gigs before these two dates – including Glastonbury Festival, T in the Park, Wolverhampton Civic AND the M.E.N in Manchester… WHY do bands do this?? It took the specialness out of the occasion for all of five minutes, but all was forgiven when they hit the stage in Hyde Park – a good gig, made all the better by spending it with a good friend.

After all of this, I suppose I should relate to why I feel like I’ve been on a musical journey of late. Vender (the band after Dropknee, the one I actually joined) split up 4 or so years ago. I left a few months before they split, amongst bad feelings with certain members of the band and some friendships that needed working on and repairing. My good friend Matt is leaving Walsall to move on to pastures new soon. I’ve been really fortunate to spend the last couple of years of my life being his neighbour and his friend. We’ve shared some good times together and I’m really going to miss him. Matt was the drummer in Vender.

Our Church held a leaving “party” for him and Gemma last night. Curry, drinks, laughter, memories and friendship ensued and a good night was had by all. We (the remaining members of Vender) were asked to perform a few songs from the band as our “tribute” to Matt. It was really fun re-learning some of these songs and performing again as the band. Matt joined us for 3 songs at the end and it felt great playing together as a 4 piece again.

It was really cool playing as the band. Remembering the fun times, the laughter, the friendship and the acknowledgement that we’ve all grown up and moved on to other things. Matt is about to start his Vicar training and new life with Gemma in Bristol, Oli and Neil are both married men, with fantastic wives and beautiful children. I finally found myself the most amazing wife in Sal.

Vender was an important part of my life. It introduced me to an amazing Church, amazing group of friends and people I’m so honoured to have spent lots of time with – Matt, Neil and Oli. I feel selfish in the fact that I want to spend much more time with Matt. I don’t want him to move away and I don’t really want to share him! In the words of someone from last night, we shall remain good friends, but I just won’t get to see him as often.

Time is moving on. To relate back to U2, in the words of the greatest opening song from an album of all time* “Time is a train, it makes the future the past, it leaves me standing in the station, my face pressed up against the glass…” – it’s about as close as I can get to explaining how I feel at the moment.

*Zoo Station – Achtung Baby.

So much to update and so little time… well, I’ve finally found some.

I really should have a look through my blog so I know where I got to in my updates previously… Ah that’s right. I was going to update you every day about my progress in my month of healthy living… I guess that’s as good a place as any to start then eh?

Well, I failed pretty miserably really! I got through to about the 10th. However, it was a pretty hardcore 10 days. Every day, I got up, did 20 sit ups and some press ups (varying in amount depending on when I got up). Each evening, I did another 20 sit ups and some press ups. I drank 250ml of cranberry juice as an anti-oxident every day. I drank whole vegatable soup for lunch, after a healthy breakfast and a full evening meal – being careful not to exceed my 2500 calories per day. In addition to this, I also swam 3 times a week with a good workout at the gym. I didn’t smoke for the 10 days and I didn’t drink either. So, pretty good really. Bloody hell it’s tough though.

Anyhow, I’m back smoking and drinking again. I’m trying to keep the other things going, but I’m failing at the moment. It’s been a really horrible June and one I’m prepared to forget the second that it finishes;

To start with – I’m finding work really tough at the moment. It’s not that it’s changing particularly, or things are any harder than they probably have been previously. It’s just that I’m really struggling. I’m struggling to wake up of a morning. I’m struggling to stay awake throughout the day. I’m struggling with talking about the same problems in every call. I’m struggling with pretty much everything. I’m basically keeping my head above the water line, with it occasionally bobbing underneath. That’s about as good as I can describe at the moment. It’s frustrating, as in this economic climate, everyone should be performing as well as they can do – and I don’t feel that I am. This in turn makes me worried about my job security – which is probably adding to my stress about my job. Bloody catch 22 situation. Anyone got any answers about how to re-find one’s mojo?

So, because my dear wife cares for me a great deal, she’s advised that I go to the doctors to talk about stuff. I’ve talked about feeling stressed, under pressure and not being able to “wake up” despite sleeping a lot. I’ve ended up being summoned for blood tests and now I’ve just got to wait for the results, which I should get next week.

On top of all that, I had the LIMS exhibition to attend in London. This is the London Internation Music Show in Excel. I actually really enjoy exhibitions as it’s a great time to get together with colleagues that I don’t normally get to see very often. Yes, they’re a little stressful, but they’re good fun in the main. This show was going to be extra important as we were hosting the world launch of the S90XS and S70XS performance synths on the Wednesday… here’s where my stressful June continued in earnest…

I travelled down to London on the Wednesday afternoon, through central London in the middle of a tube strike. It took me bloody ages. Eventually I arrived at The Tower hotel next to Tower Bridge and checked in to my room. I had just unpacked, got ready and raring to go for the evening. I nipped out for a quick cigarette before my dealers started arriving… Sal rang. That was unusual as she never really rings whilst I’m at work. It was then that I heard her mention the dreaded words that we’d been burgled.

Shit.

I jumped straight back in the car and headed back through a heavilly congested central London back home. I was incredibly worried about Sal. I needed to get back and check that she was ok. With the help and support of our amazing friends… (name checks… Steph, James, Gemma, Matt, an absolutely fantastic Mike, Steve, Nic, Stu and Kelly) Sal was ok when I got home and Jo and Sal were cleaning and putting things back together again.

They nicked the usual stuff. Camcorders, cameras, Wii, Wii games, DS, DS games, laptop, it was annoying as hell. They threw a huge rock through the window of our back door and then ran around the house. They tore my office apart looking for my beloved Mac, along with a real mess of the spare room. Fortunately, they only took the quick sellable electricals, but nothing else of any note. It was just the frustration really.

Well, here I am. It’s the 17th June. A lot has happened. I’m still only half way through the month. I’ve now got zero money due to having to pay for burgular alarms, repairs, insurance excess etc. It’s not helped my motivation to do anything. It’s not helped my stress levels etc. Married life was supposed to have a honeymoon period wasn’t it? Was married life supposed to be sweet?

After all the fun of the wedding and the fact that I’ve pretty much loved every second of my working life up until now… I’m in a dark place at the moment. I actually sat in a coffee shop in LIMS with my head in my hands wondering what it would be like if I wasn’t around anymore. I am grateful for my friends and my life really. I am married to the most amazing woman. I just worry that I am not being able to provide everything that I would like to provide for her and what I promised her in my wedding speech. I promised her a life of love, happiness, fulfillment… not a life of depression, arguments and stress. I want to break this vicious cycle in which I’ve found myself, but I’m really not sure how.

June 2009 is a month that I really will be happy to see the back of. This has not been a happy month. I’m just grateful for an amazing wife and an amazing bunch of friends.

Well, forgive me for updating my first day – but I really should do this properly;

Today I have been swimming. I have decided that for my three meals, I will eat a cereal for breakfast. I have bought some thick soups that I can heat up in the morning, pop in a flask and eat for lunch time whilst I’m out on the road. Then Sal and I will eat an evening meal together in the evening.

I have everything I need to make this month a success. I have bought a thermos flask (I didn’t have one!!) to keep my soup warm for lunchtimes. I have checked the calorie content, saturated fat content and salt / sugar content of the soups.

I have also bought a supply of cranberry juice, which is a good anti-oxident and source of vitamin C. In addition to all of this, I have been swimming this evening and completed my 20 sit-ups. I will do another 20 sit-ups before I go to bed this evening.

The not smoking today has been ok. I’ve had some seriously bad craving moments though. I’ve also found myself snap at Sal occasionally for the lightest of reasons. I must acknowledge that it’s down to a substantial swift in my lifestyle and my body is starting to miss the nicotene.

So far, I’m keen to make this month a success. I’m looking forward to seeing what effect all of this has on the quality of how I feel in the mornings and evenings. I’m also keen to know what sort of effect this will have on my weight. June is officially my month of health and fitness. I’m going full tilt to see just how much better I can feel.

Day 1 is nearing an end. Day 2 begins soon…